“A man caught trying to have sex with a dog told police he did it because he had been wrongfully convicted of sexually abusing a child and wanted to do something bad if he was going to jail. Christopher Pye pleaded guilty last month to bestiality. He was also convicted in provincial court last year of sexual assault on a nine-year-old girl… Pye was arrested after two people reported seeing a man trying to have sex with a dog in a van last July. At least three times the witnesses saw Pye, his jeans around his ankles, try to manipulate the yelping dog into position. Twice the dog, a friend’s pet, ran away. Both times Pye chased the animal down and returned it to the van. He seemed oblivious to the presence of the witnesses, court was told Tuesday. One witness approached within three metres to ask if everything was all right. Pye later denied any sexual contact with the dog, but when an officer told him RCMP had mounted a video camera in the park and had evidence on tape, he changed his story… He later told psychiatric experts he got the idea after viewing Internet pornographic sites showing people having sex with animals. He also said he was angry at the earlier charge, saying the girl’s complaints to police had ruined his life.” —Canadian Press (Canada)

Here in New York you see a lot of weird things. You see drug addicts, bums, nut jobs, criminals, and plain old eccentrics — all doing their thing. Often you just laugh to yourself and look the other way. Sometimes it takes an act of will to tune them out. Other times you find that you’ve become so hardened to the general display of weirdness that you don’t even notice. But then once in a while you see something that forces you to act. Somebody is in distress — passing out, getting mugged, having a heart attack — and you have to step in and do something. You call the cops. You call an ambulance. You get the person a cab. If you’re a really nice guy, maybe you even see the person home. After all, you hope that somebody would take such good care of you too, if you needed it.

But one thing you’re not likely to see, no matter how many years you spend as an urban flâneur, is a man screwing a dog in public. Sure, you see sex on the streets: sometimes a yuppie couple secretes themselves in a dark doorway, or sometimes two bums fuck on top of a heating grate. But a man boning a dog? That’s a rarity. What do you do? Choose to ignore it? Carry on with your business in the hopes you forget ever having seen such a pathetic act of animal rape? Call the cops? But then you feel kind of stupid calling the police. What do you say? “Hello, 911? There’s a guy doing something obscene to a dog. Define obscene? Uh, well, the guy’s like, you know, I think he’s trying to have sex with it. Yes, that’s right. He’s screwing the dog.” Then you wonder if the 911 operator has to finish laughing before he conveys the alarm to the police.

At any rate, this guy is no doubt a messed-up character. If you’re angry at what you think is a wrongful conviction, the right thing to do is to protest your situation. Involve your congressman. Contact the media. Write a book. Get the word out. The wrong thing to do is to stage a public act of bestiality. Having flagrant sex with a resistant dog shortly after being convicted of child molestation is the sexual equivalent of throwing good money after bad. You think you’re screwing the dog, but really you’re just screwing yourself. There is absolutely no credible excuse for the behavior. You will only do more jail time and have a worse record when you get out. No doubt your fellow inmates will get wind of it and make merciless fun of you too. Do you want to spend your years in jail followed by taunts of “Hey, dog-fucker?”

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